Mary Catherine Maxwell
Born In: Sydney Mines, Nova Scotia, Canada
Born: August 21st, 1934
Passed in: North Sydney, Nova Scotia, Canada
Passed on: May 24th, 2012
Mary Catherine Maxwell passed away upon sunrise, with family at her side, on Thursday, May 24, 2012, at the Northside General Hospital.
Born Aug. 21, 1934, in Sydney Mines, Mary C. grew up in Cranberry and was the spunky, mischievous daughter of Katie (MacMullin) and Jerry MacPhee. In her late teens, she would meet her future husband from the then notorious Gannon Road area – Danny Maxwell. He knew she was a keeper and would shortly after carve her phone number in the dash of a friend’s car. They were married after a brief courtship on Feb. 24, 1955, in the very same hospital — foregoing a planned Valentine’s wedding as the groom recovered in a body cast from a motor vehicle crash.
They would go on to live together “out the road” where our father would walk to and from his job as a stevedore at the wharf. Our mom stayed home and raised a family of four children — Anne Geraldine, Catherine Adeline, Daniel Lawrence and “the baby” John Kenneth. A son Gordon died in infancy.
When our father died tragically and unexpectedly, our mom carried on, without a whole lot of support; with a quiet dignity and undeniable resolve to ensure her children had the best possible chance at a decent life. She’d roll up her sleeves, hold her head up high, and get at it. Part-time and domestic work kept the wolf away from the door and she managed to make ends meet. Somehow, some way, the fridge was always full, we always had “big meals”, the house was always warm, and our clothes always clean. And every Saturday, without fail, she lugged us all to Cranberry to visit “Katie and Jerry”, often by bus, whether we liked it or not. As mom was a coalminer’s daughter and our dad the son of a coal miner, we knew what stock we came from.
Mom was an awesome cook and an even better baker, and there was always more than enough for our friends or unexpected company. Come Exhibition time, she would buy all the blueberries we could pick, offering a better price than the neighbourhood rate. That got us to the Exhibition. And upon spending hours in the kitchen baking, she wouldn’t bat an eye when we and our friends would polish off a couple of her pies and half a cake in a few minutes. She kept an open-door policy; if you were a friend of any of her kids, you were good in her books. Like most families in the neighborhood, we didn’t have much growing up and it wasn’t until much later, as adults, that we realized we grew up in “a poor family”. She managed to keep that realization from us by always putting herself last to ensure her children got what she felt they ought to have.
Mom enjoyed watching the Olympics and Hockey Night in Canada on Saturday nights, but would never go to the rink, field or to a race to watch her boys. She loved parties and socials but never drank with her daughters. As we got older, she looked forward to when we would come home on weekends or for the summer to fill the house with music and laughter; the more the merrier, the louder the better. She often spoke of a contentedness of lying in bed at night unable to sleep because there was a crowd downstairs. The one annoying trait our mom did have was never failing to miss an opportunity to brag about her children to anyone within earshot. She continued to sing the praises of her adult children long after each had left home, especially to the embarrassment of Larry. When each of us would come to inevitable forks in the road, we always seemed to know which road to take. Or when life presented significant challenges, we would think of mom back home, and felt we owed it to her, if not ourselves, to try harder and make good decisions.
Mom was a very proud woman and she felt it was important to own what you had. Up until her last days, she took pride in having a solid credit rating having made it a lifelong priority to pay her bills on time, and to pay as she went.
Mom took pleasure in the simple things in life — a loud game of cards, a drive in the car, a pot of tea shared with company, spending time at the cabin in Middle River, having a full house while cooking and baking for others, going to grandson Danny’s gigs, and sitting back and taking in the fullness of a family gathering.
Mom felt she got to reap the rewards of her sacrifices and hard work, living to see her children grow up to have their own children. She fussed and doted on each of her 11 grandchildren and one great-grandchild, somehow making each of them feel favoured and special. With a knowing look, she would slip money and treats to each, often in the presence of unsuspecting or unapproving parents.
Our mom was the toughest and bravest women we’ve ever known. Not one for going far from the Northside, she twice travelled alone, by train and plane, to spend time with her new grandson Mathieu in Toronto. She faced all of life’s challenges head on, never once feeling sorry for herself and seldom asking for help. Later in life, she had developed a number of chronic conditions but always seemed to bounce back, and to have more lives than a cat. The word resilient comes to mind. We will always remember her fierce determination, her plain, straight talk, and her proud independence — always well hidden by a warm smile, and her sassy banter. Her legacy will be our responsibility to pass some of that on to our own children.
Mom wasn’t much for church and religion; she did not seek comfort, hope or guidance in places where she deemed it not to be found. Our mom left this world with the comfort of knowing each of her children would be OK. It seemed as if she had chosen the time was right for her to go. And she went on her terms — quick and stoically, without fuss or complaint.
Left to share in the warm memories and “mom stories” are daughter Geraldine McCarthy (North Sydney) and grandchildren Danny, Roland and Sara, daughter Adeline (Halifax) and grandchildren Logan and Lauren Ingram, son Larry (Sydney Mines) and daughter-in-law Bonnie and grandchildren Mathieu, Mason, Claire and Carson, and son Kenny (North Sydney) and daughter-in-law Wanda and grandchildren Samuel and Olivia. She also leaves a great-grandson Seth Williams (son of Danny McCarthy) and long-time companion Archie Murphy. She is also survived by siblings Theresa (MacDonald), Christina (Bonnar), Vivian (Bailey) and Auley MacPhee, and brother Larry MacPhee.
Mom was predeceased by her husband Daniel, son Gordon, son-in-law and special friend Mickey McCarthy, her parents Jerry and Katie MacPhee, father and mother-in-law Alec and Carrie Maxwell, and brothers Frank, Rod and Billy MacPhee.
As per mom’s wishes, there will be no church service or religious ceremony. There will be a reception to acknowledge and celebrate the life of our mother Mary Catherine Maxwell on Monday, May 28 from 2-4 p.m. in the basement of St. Joseph’s Church on Archibald Avenue in North Sydney.
Mom specified no flowers and no tears! A private graveside ceremony will immediately follow at Lakeside Cemetery in North Sydney where mom’s remains will be laid to rest with her first love – our father – Danny Maxwell.
Online condolences may be sent to www.wjdooley.com
